Those are some bad weddings

Is it just me or does there always seem to be a dozen or so people killed by a drone in Pakistan or Afghanistan. Often coming or going to a wedding no less.

It's like when they were constantly killing the #3 guy in al queda. It seemed to happen every week.

Always read the label

Sigh. This is why you need to carefully read directions in the store when you're trying a food item you've never had before.

I just bought Mancini's spaghetti dinner: big meatballs with "Sunday sauce." I was totally looking forward to it; a green salad, some garlic bread on the side, an amusing little Pinot Grigio.

Unfortunately, after I eagerly ripped open the package, I saw the hidden directions: "Defrost in refrigerator overnight."

Oh well, I haven't ordered pizza in a while.

Holy crap

It would have been too much after MJ and Farrah

I thought Debbie had died. No exaggeration, I heard "Only in my Dreams" THREE times in a long weekend in Florida. I have no idea why it was being played so much. Unusual musical tastes down there.

Congrats, Minnesota

Minn. Supreme Court Declares Franken Winner in Senate Race

I think Fat Ass Limbaugh's fat head just exploded. Bwahaha.

$284 later...

The GE repair guy just left, after replacing some fan thing - whatever.

The damn fridge is less than 3 years old. My old fridge was probably about 20. It was in the apartment when I moved in. It was still going strong, but, nooo, I had to get a fancy schmancy stainless steel.

America doesn't build things any more.

It's sad.

More Republican hijinks

Naked ex-mayor arrested at campsite

"A former mayor found sitting naked and holding a beer at a Rabun County campsite told police he wasn’t the same naked man seen walking around earlier.

Ranger Brandon Walls and a deputy sheriff went to the campsite Saturday evening after a complaint of a man walking naked in Earls Ford Road, according to the report. Musselwhite appeared to be intoxicated, and several alcoholic beverages were at the campsite, Walls said.

Walls said he had spoken to Musselwhite earlier in the day regarding an ATV the former mayor was driving.

“He looked at us and said hello,” according to the report.

Musselwhite then asked why he was being visited.

“I said the complainant had specifically said his campsite, and the fact that he was still nude made me think it was him,” Walls wrote

Musselwhite, a Republican, was elected to the City Council in 2000. He served on the council for six years, including as mayor of the town. In 2006, he lost a bid for a state Senate seat."

Bill Clinton was a freaking eunuch compared to these Republicans.

Does she use Linked In?

This might be longer than the lead story in The Times today.

But, you know, when you are writing to "Dearest," well, you want to speak from the heart.

Dearest, Kindly accept my apology for sending mail to you.I believe you are a highly respected personality, I am writing this mail with tears, sadness and pains. I know it will come to you as a suprise since we haven't known or come across each other before considering the fact that I sourced your profile from a human resource profile database on your country through Internet. I am Miss Esther John Garang 24 years old female from the Republic of Sudan, the Daughter of Late Dr. John Garang. Before my late father’s death in Uganda on 31st of July 2005, he was Vice President of Sudan and was kill by Sudan President Omar al Bashir in helicopter crash. You can read more about my father in the link below

(I'll save you the link)

I am constrained to contact you because of the maltreatment which I am receiving from my step mother. She planned to take away all my late father's treasury and properties from me since the unexpected death of my beloved Father. Meanwhile I wanted to travel to Europe, but she hide away my international passport and other valuable documents. Luckily she did not discover where I kept my father's File which contained important documents. Now I am presently staying in the Mission House in Burkina Faso. I am seeking for longterm relationship and investment assistance. My father of blessed memory deposited the sum of US$12.7 Million in one bank in Burkina Faso with my name as the next of kin. I had contacted the Bank to clear the deposit but the Branch Manager told me that being a refugee, my status according to the local law does not authorize me to carry out the operation. However, he advised me to provide a trustee who will stand on my behalf. I had wanted to inform my stepmother about this deposit but I am affraid that she will not offer me anything after the release of the money. Therefore, I decide to seek for your help in transferring the money into your bank account while I will relocate to your country and settle down with you. As you indicated your interest to help me I will give you the account number and the contact of the bank where my late beloved father deposited the money with my name as the next of kin. It is my intention to compensate you with 20% of the total money for your assitance and the balance shall be my investment in any profitable venture which you will recommend to me as have no any idea about foreign investment. Please all communications should be through this email address only for confidential purposes. Thanking you alot in anticipation of your quick response. I will send you my photos in my next email. Yours Miss Esther John Garang

Oooh, I want some of that money. And I bet she's good looking too!

GE sucks, they bring bad things to life...

This is how the U.S. ends, not with a bang, but with GE becoming just another piss ass company.

General Electric used to be - seriously - the mark of an amazing product.

The company was founded by Edison, for crissakes.

Dishwashers, jet engines, TV sets, can openers - not to mention products I don't even want to know about - but most of all, damn, their refrigerators were really, really good.

Not everyone buys a SubZero or a Viking. But GE fridges were a pretty nice product level.

I moved into my apartment a decade ago. And there was a GE fridge in the kitchen that probably was there since the building opened in the 80s. And it worked really good.

A year or so ago, doing an "upgrade," I got new stainless steel appliances - micro, dishwasher, stove and, of course, refrigerator. All GE brand.

Well, this week, the fucking GE refrigerator basically went kaput. The freezer part is going fine, everything in there seems to be solid - but the refrigerator part, eh, no.

I first realized it when I got stuck with a sour carton of milk a few days ago. Initially, I was ready to blame the milk people, then I realized the bottles of soda and beer weren't quite as cold as they usually were.

So I cranked it up to 9 - the highest level on the temp control - what no 11? - but still everything just didn't seem right.

Well, now, I'm fucked - stuck with a stainless steel paper weight. Because, of course, the warranty has ended after one year.

Oh, thank you GE. Thank you fucking Home Depot (where I bought this piece of crap).

If you ever wondered why America is no longer the economic powerhouse of the world, here's a hint: Blame GE. Blame Home Depot.

They sell shoddy pieces of disposable crap.

This is the real tragedy

Never mind what's happening in Iran. How can I spend an hour on the treadmill and it tells me I only lost 410 calories?

I'll get that all back just sniffing the cork on an amusing little pinot noir at dinner tonight!

I feel so inadequate

That Virgin America quiz was today, and I just "completed" it.

Ugh, let's just say it was not pretty.

Here was one of the questions: "While chatting with your college roommate, her mother borrowed the keyboard to ask you about sightseeing in their upcoming trip to the US: Hvilken stat har det største stadion i USA? For this contest, however, you should provide your answer in English. Hint: Use Google Talk to say "Hej" to da2en@bot.talk.google.com!"

Sigh.

Let's just say I probably won't be getting one of the free tix on Virgin. I really wanted one, love that airline, but, er, are they aware they are dealing with the American public and not the freaken' Japanese!

Now ask me who played Louis on Taxi and I'm going first class everywhere they fly (mostly on their Vegas leg, of course).

Oh well, maybe they'll do a pop culture test next time. Hint, hint.

Here's all you need to know about Mark Sanford

"As a congressman, Sanford voted in favor of three of four articles of impeachment against President Bill Clinton, citing the need for 'moral legitimacy.'"

Well, ok, he is quite the hypocrite - shocking, I know, a family values, right-wing Republican who is a hypocrite!!! - but he is also quite the email charmer. Here's an excerpt of a missive to his little Argentinian spitfire:

"I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificent gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines or that I love the curve of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of the night's light — but hey, that would be going into sexual details."

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.

And we get to play that video again...

...for yet another Republican holy roller who was considering running for President in 2012. Buh bye, Mark, we hardly knew ye.

Has he tried a GPS?

Mark Sanford, the Governor of South Carolina, went missing over the weekend, just dropped out of sight for five days, no security detail with him, his wife didn't know where he was. "He was writing something and wanted some space to get away from the kids,” she told the A.P. on Monday.

(Nice for the kids to hear, by the way, that their father didn't want to be near them on, um, Father's Day.)

Anyway, when the press started asking where he was, his staff said he was tired after a long legislative session, and was "hiking the Appalachian trail."

Uh huh.

Ooops, well now it turns out, apparently he was in Argentina on a personal trip, driving along the coastline there.

That's a hell of a discrepancy. And from what I understand, the coastline of Argentina is not that accessible.

Hmm, something fishy going on here, wouldn't you say?

Oh, and do I even need to note, this guy's a Republican, of course - the party of weird, freaky fetishes. I'm pretty sure you can find a few down Argentine way. (It's also the party of hypocritical family values right-wingers who screw around. Paging: Larry Craig, Newt Gingrich, David Vitter, Rush Limbaugh, Mark Foley, John Ensign, etc., etc. - there's not enough room on the Internet to list them all).

Sanford better hope that what happens in Buenos Aires, stays in Buenos Aires.

Buffy kicks ass...on Twilight guy

Nice mashup here, showing why Buffy ruled for so many years.

Digital still doesn't quite compare

Eastman Kodak to discontinue Kodachrome

There's a new contendah

I used to think the Cablevision commercials were the most annoying ads you could see on TV.

Even beating out even such normal winners as Shamwow or the Snuggly, and simply because those attrocities really only show up on late night infomercials, you know, on Ch. 9 at 2 am - so if you see them, well, it's your own damn fault.

But the Cablevision ads, with those incredibly annoying jingles, can catch you during a Seinfeld rerun on Ch. 5 or TBS in late fringe.

But now, I have to say, there is a new winner.

Freecreditreport dot com.

Holy shit.

So BAD. So ANNOYING. So STUPID.

Not to mention, the service is a rip-off. You can get your credit rating for FREE by LAW. You don't need to use these clowns.

Please, Baby Jesus, make them stop.

Who are these brainiacs who read Too Saucy?

Another genius lurking out there is heard from. I posted recently about a contest Virgin America is running where you have to answer a series of questions within a time limit, using various Google apps.

They ran a sample quiz a few weeks ago, and, um, it is going to be freaken' hard.

Love that airline. Hating this quiz.

But some people keep leaving comments at that post, casually answering some of the questions: "#FF4F00 is the hex triplet -- a 7 digit code for international orange."

Or as another commenter explained in more detail: "just google the three things ("NASA Advanced Crew Escape Suits" "Golden Gate Bridge" "Tokyo Tower"), and you will find websites (including wikipedia!) about the color "International Orange". Just copy the HTML code for the color (it's on the wikipedia page!) and paste it in the answer!"

Of course. What was I thinking!

Jumping the gun

I thought my credit card was missing, frantically searched all over for it, even calling the restaurant I had been at the night before to see if I had left it there.

No, of course not. So I called Citibank to report the loss. The rep immediately canceled the card, even read back what my last charge was to see if it was one I recognized, Yes, it was mine - well at least no-one had used it.

She said she'd send a new card and account number within 3 business days. Fine.

I hung up and LITERALLY within 10 minutes - oh yes - found the card, stuck in the pocket of a pair of shorts I had on while doing laundry the day before. I had thrown it in the pocket in case I needed to add money to my laundry card and forgot about it.

Of course, I called back but they cannot un-cancel the card. Pain in the ass, topped off by the fact that I have several recurring charges on this card every month; TV, cell phone, etc - it saves paying those bills individually and I get reward points. But now the joy of having to reapply for the recurring feature with a new card number for all of them. Sigh.

Sometimes I'm too conscientious for my own good.

Sigh

I just booked for a couple nights stay at a Hilton in Florida.

I hate to think I'm somehow contributing money to Paris Hilton.

That's unfortunate

Girls, avoid slightly side view pictures in your bikini.

Even if you're Kristen Bell.